The Oldest Love Poem I Made

Like what I have mentioned in my previous post, I have started making poems since a very long time ago. Maybe they are not good, but I liked them anyway. Or at least some, because those I dont like will eventually get discarded and those I like will be re-written in the new books I have…

I also mentioned before that I have lost many of my poems, apparently, due to my untidy nature. But just today, I found my latest archive which I last filed in 2007. And in this archive, I found the oldest love poem I have ever made.

Numbers was written on the bottom, indicating the the time it was written. Sometimes I write as detailed as hour to minute, sometimes just year, sometimes not at all.

This one, on the far bottom, only says “2000”. I was 13 at the time. And seeing it again, I remember why I wrote this poem.

It was not a 1st love thing, no way.

It starts at the turning tides of my mood on film types. Around that time, I was very fascinated with war movies and tales of valor. And I thought that those romantic films like titanic and all suck to the deepest part of hell.

Especially when these romantic movies show many conflicts and suddenly love pops out and becomes a magical solution to it all.

But then I learned that war is just pure hatred and inhuman. How wars are just because of political interest or sometimes even economical backgrounds. These heroes throwing their lives for honor, glory, for freedom, or whatever. I thought most of them started to go nonsense.

And many other things too. There are gains which war offers. Such as lands, profit, power, even rights to write history. But using these as reasons of war, are under the assumption that military power are expendable lives as price to pay and collateral damage is a mere consequence.

And I found that it is not totally unreasonable to put love as counter to it. Apparently love means a lot. Well, at that time I didnt think as far as love includes love to power and love for money and all. But I started seeing love as a realistic power.

And in the midst of thought on this, I was introduced to the song Innuendo-Queen. Then it inspired me to make quite a number of poems, including this one. So, enjoy…

Exposition I

While tears have dropped down to the earth
And sorrow enwraps the holy nights
I see a rainbow soar within your eyes
When a crystal raindrop falls
Then it ends upon your tender lips

While people honor has dropped down by gold
And ‘live’ stands before ‘consume’
I see the bright light on your face
Where peace shines immortal
Though your teeth cluck with rage

While people bow to their fears
I bow to none but you
Will or wont you raise me?
Then show me your rainbow…

Show me your rainbow…

Fajri M. Muhammadin, 2000


PS: The part where it says “And ‘live’ stands before ‘consume’“, is one among many meaningful quotes from my dad. And this one did indeed grew to one of the principles I try to hold until today.

He said: “We eat to live, not live to eat”

Hahahahaha, what a dad :p